Healing the Hurt Inner Child that Grew Up
Growing up, I navigated a difficult upbringing marked by various forms of abuse within my own home. What seemed like “normal” to me was a stark contrast to the experiences of others around me. Initially met with confused expressions from classmates when discussing my family life, this disconnect eventually evolved into a pattern of toxic relationships, self-destructive behaviors, and a profound loss of self-assurance and direction. As I transitioned into adulthood, the wounds of my inner child became more demanding of attention and healing. It took years, but I finally found the courage to confront these wounds head-on and take responsibility for my journey towards healing. I hope to encourage you to do the same. From the perspective of someone who has experienced various forms of abuse, this journey is both strenuous and liberating—a true testament to the resilience of the human spirit and the power of self-compassion. Whether you were also a victim of childhood abuse, or at any point growing up felt rejected, unheard, or unworthy - inner child healing can benefit you greatly.
Childhood abuse comes in many forms—physical, emotional, sexual, and psychological—each leaving its own unique imprint on the survivor. The inner child, the innocent and vulnerable aspect of ourselves, bears the brunt of this trauma, carrying the scars of the past well into adulthood. For those who have endured such trauma, the wounds run deep, often manifesting in deeply rooted feelings of shame, worthlessness, and mistrust. As mentioned, you don’t have to experience severe trauma to still benefit from inner child healing. Whether it be from friends or family members misunderstanding or rejecting you, or the ever-changing societal pressures to “be” or “look” a certain way, we have all experienced some form of wounding to this sensitive part of ourselves. The part of us that craves freedom, exploration, and creativity.
Healing the wounded inner child is a journey of self-discovery, self-compassion, and self-reclamation. It requires a willingness to confront the pain of the past, to sit with uncomfortable emotions, and to embrace vulnerability as a pathway to healing.
The journey begins with acknowledging the wounds that lie buried deep within—the memories of abuse, the unspoken grief of a childhood lost, the overwhelming feelings of fear and inadequacy. This process of acknowledgment is both cathartic and confronting, as it requires facing the darkness of our past experiences head-on while refusing to let it define who we are. Think about your own negative thought patterns or behaviors that you hope to release and be willing to uncover where these might stem from.
In order to start the healing process, we have to first reconnect with our hurt inner child—the part of ourselves that still longs for validation, love, and safety. This involves creating a safe and nurturing space within where the inner child feels seen, heard, and valued. You can do so by visualizing support for the younger version of yourself in meditation, journaling your feelings while looking at a childhood photo, writing a letter from the perspective of your inner child, or writing a letter from your current self to the wounded childhood version. Reconnecting with the inner child is not always easy as it requires patience, gentleness, and a willingness to listen to the whispers of the past we may have been avoiding. It may involve revisiting painful memories, offering comfort to the wounded aspects of ourselves, and re-parenting the inner child with the love and care that may have been lacking during childhood.
Re-parenting the inner child is a deeply transformative process—one that involves offering ourselves the love, compassion, and validation that we may have never received growing up. It is about becoming the nurturing parent to ourselves that we always needed. This process of re-parenting may involve setting healthy boundaries for our time and energy, practicing more self-care, and reframing the negative beliefs and patterns that stem from negative childhood experiences. It is about learning to be our own advocate, our own champion, and our own source of unconditional love.
One of the most challenging aspects of inner child healing is the journey toward forgiveness—both of others and of oneself. Forgiveness does not mean excusing or condoning the actions of those who caused harm; rather, it is a gift that we give to ourselves—a release from the burdens of anger, resentment, and bitterness. You can find a way to forgive while still setting firm boundaries to not allow this type of treatment back into your life. If you are not yet in a space where you are able to forgive another person, start with forgiving yourself. Forgive yourself for any lapses in judgement, mistakes, or poor treatment you have done towards yourself or others. Forgiveness is a deeply personal and often painful process. It requires courage, humility, and a willingness to let go of the past in order to embrace the present moment fully. It is about acknowledging the humanity in ourselves and others, and recognizing that we are all flawed, imperfect beings in need of compassion and understanding.
As we journey through the process of inner child healing, we begin to reclaim our sense of wholeness and authenticity. We realize that our worthiness does not depend on external validation or approval, but rather stems from the inherent value of our being. Simply by existing, you are worthy of all the love and abundance the world has to offer, even if past experiences have made you feel otherwise.
Embracing wholeness means embracing all aspects of ourselves—the light and the shadow, the joy and the pain. It is about integrating the wounded aspects of ourselves with the strength, resilience, and wisdom that we have gained along the way. It is about recognizing that our scars are not signs of weakness, but rather symbols of our courage and resilience in the face of adversity. By embracing every part of ourselves, we tap into the truth that no matter our story, we are worthy of unconditional love and acceptance.
The process of healing our inner child involves more than just addressing past traumas; it also entails welcoming their inherent wisdom and joy into our present existence. One powerful way to do this is by reconnecting with fun and exciting activities that we loved as children. Draw, sing, dance, play outside, eat an ice cream cone, watch a favorite childhood movie, do whatever it was that brought you uncontrollable happiness. By reclaiming these cherished pastimes and experiencing them in a new way, we can reignite our childlike wonder and curiosity, free from the constraints of other adults’ rules or expectations.
Healing the wounded inner child is a journey of self-discovery, self-compassion, and self-empowerment. It is a journey that requires courage, patience, and unwavering faith in the power of healing even when the burden feels too heavy to bear. Above all, healing the hurt inner child is a journey of hope—a testament to the resilience of the human spirit and the transformative power of love and forgiveness. To all those who are embarking on this journey, know that you are not alone. Reach out to others for support if you need it and be gentle with yourself as you navigate this path to more acceptance.
Inner child healing does not happen overnight, but by choosing to go through this transformative process, we not only heal ourselves, but we start healing the world around us. So when it gets difficult, remember always that you are worthy of love, you are deserving of healing, and you are capable of reclaiming your power and embracing the fullness of who you are.
If you are looking for additional support in your journey and feel called to work with me, you can book a private healing session here. Through energy clearing and intuitive guidance, I am here to support the hurt inner child that grew up within you and provide encouragement throughout your own healing journey.
Sending love on your path ahead!
